Just a quick little post tonight about marriage. To anyone wondering, marriage on the road is the exact same as marriage at home.
I love my husband dearly. He is a fantastic father and a loving husband. He’s driven, direct, and stubborn. He loves his work, is deeply defined by his professional success, and never has a problem saying ‘no.’ He has the palate of an 8-year old. He loves a good debate, always take the side of the opposition, and likes to push other peoples buttons. He has high expectations of himself and everyone around him. He has a bit of a temper, and he remembers everything. He believes in winners and losers and always knowing which one he is. He loves to get up early, jump into the day, and gets some of his best work done in the mornings. He lives by a plan/schedule, needs details, prefers to always be in the lead, and has no problem setting the pace. He’s a typical male, and as such, sex is on his mind 90% of the time. He needs quiet time to himself, he needs time with just his wife, and he needs time with only his son.
I know my husband loves me. I strive every day to be a good mother and wife. I am not perfect, I have plenty of faults. In my personal life, I do not speak up enough, I often take the passive approach, and I don’t communicate my needs very well. I enjoy my job though I often take it way too personally and have a problem saying ‘no.’ I love to cook, try new recipes, and experience new foods. I have high expectations of myself and everyone around me. I rarely get mad, get my feeling hurt easily, and I have a terrible memory. I think it’s more important to enjoy the game regardless of winning or losing. I enjoy lazy mornings with a quiet cup of coffee. I love running in the afternoon and get some of my best work done at night. I like a rough schedule of options, but want to see where the day takes me. I love taking a stroll and have no problem being left behind. I am a typical woman, and as such, 90% of the time I am brain is multi-tasking and sex is rarely at the top of the task list. I need time to myself, I need time with my just my husband, and I need time with my son.
We are who we are, and traveling has only magnified our personalities. My husband drives me absolutely crazy sometimes, and I know my husband is deeply frustrated by me sometimes. But there is no one I would rather be on this adventure with than him. Being in each others space every day for the last 4-months has been hard, but I think it is making us stronger as a couple. I think we are learning to communicate better and I think we are both being forced to be more vulnerable. I believe marriage is about finding someone you love for their weaknesses as much as you love them for their strengths.
My advice about traveling with your spouse … it’s like having kids … having kids to “fix” your marriage is a terrible idea. Traveling the same idea. It is hard, so go in with your game face on, knowing it’s an adventure that will test you and be prepared to put in the work.
I am looking forward to seeing where Jim and I are 8-months from now. I think we will be closer and our bound will be stronger than ever before. Until then, I am enjoying putting in the work with him.
Great post. Vicki and I are doing a marriage group, which is based on Love and Respect. Women need love, men need respect. Now, it is Christian based, but the principles can be applied regardless – check it out if you want
https://youtu.be/388ZduTXiws
Keep fighting the good fight!
Thanks Todd! I am supposed to be ‘working,’ but couldn’t focus. Clearly you can see where my head is from this post. Now I gotta get back to work!